Tuesday, November 18, 2008


The past two mornings my temp has been down 5/10ths of a degree.

One day I can convince myself is a fluke. Two and I start to worry based on past experience.

Today is CD30. I'm guessing I won't make it to CD31, much less through the full two-week wait, despite ovulation apparently occurring late this cycle (CD19).

I have this image in my head of DH's sperm showing up with candy, flowers, and teddy bears, and my egg(s) telling the sperm to talk to the hand, that they don't want any part of this reproduction thing and then slamming the door in their collective faces.

I'm afraid that I'll go through another 3 months of this trial and error, except this time with shots(!), and still have nothing to show for the time and effort (lets not worry about the expense at this point).

I'm convinced that my eggs aren't going to cooperate without coercion and I'm afraid that by the time we get to in-vitro, with or without ICSI, there's going to be no hope left.

It's not a good day.


  1. For me, I don't think the hope will ever die. But it gets tiring to listen to her siren song.


  2. I just wanted to thank you for stopping my blog, and also to lend my support. This IF journey can test our very limits. I hope yours come to a happy end very soon, and wish you the best in the meantime.